Sunday, January 11, 2009

Just A Couple Of Things I Want To Remember

I was listening to some of the podcasts from today as I was doing some driving and heard a couple of things that I just want to make a note about in hopes that I remember them years down the road.

1. Using a bottle as a tool for attachment. Dawn Davenport, the host, had on a guest that's an expert on adoption attachment. One thing they brought up was the idea of giving your adopted child - even older children - a bottle. Not as a feeding tool but as an attachment tool. put juice or something in the bottle, give the nipple a small opening, and then take the time to rock and hold your child while s/he drinks. On the show they said that this was acceptable as long as the child was comfortable with it. I think it's a cool idea.

2. In another podcast they were discussing how/when to bring up the adoption story with your child - and the general consensus is to make words such as "adoption" and "birth parents" common and normal from the very beginning - just by saying them even before the child understands what they mean. They talked about having a "life book" with pictures from the home country in it and reading children's books about adoption. So, the idea hit me, I want to make a "just for us" Children's book about whatever the adoption story ends up being. Of course - my mind starts dreaming wild dreams - but I think it would be cool to take some pictures and simple wording and tell the story and then it get printed off at a place like in one of their "book" formats for the child. I'd love to do a story that shows the two time lines of me getting to the child and then the timeline of the birth mother having the child and the child going to the orphanage/baby house/etc and then when our time lines meet in the same place. I can write the first two pages at this point. haha. "In America there was a woman with dark hair. She lived in an apartment and had two cats. She worked at a school teaching children. She was happy but she thought it would be wonderful to have a family and started thinking about all the ways there were to create families." . And then later, "One day the woman knew it was time to start her family so she called a place that helps families find each other and . . . " Anyway. That's the English-major side of me coming out. Depending on the history I get on my child we'll see how the "two time lines becoming one" thing goes - but right now I really love the idea. My "dream" level of the book is to take real pictures from the journey and have an artist "illustrate" them into children's book type images that still resemble me and my child and then fill in the gaps of the story for which pictures most likely will not exist. (My child's birth for example)

On a completely different note. I'm still completely undecided about if I want to pursue the adoption of one child or two at a time. i know I eventually want at least 2. However, I've decided that's something else (along with country) that I'm going to stop trying to figure out until I get closer to beginning this process.


  1. I love the book idea.

    Have you read at all about inducing lactation if you do end up adopting a baby? I know a couple mothers who breastfed their adopted babies. Both the health and attachment benefits are phenomenal.

    I always thought that if I did adopt kids someday, I'd love to adopt a set of siblings. It would be so wonderful for them to get to stay together instead of being adopted to separate families.

  2. If I end up doing a domestic newborn adoption I'm def. interested in inducing lactation. I haven't done enough research to figure out how old I'm willing to start that at if I adopt an older infant.

  3. I think both ideas are great. I love the idea of having someone illustrate you and your child from photos. It would be great to find an artist from your child's native country (if an international adoption) to add some native style illustrations/traditions.

  4. These are some wonderful ideas. I hope that you can use at least the book idea. It's so cute and creative!